This is exactly what Joab did in finding a mediator for Absalom. He found a woman of wisdom, and she spoke the language of David.
“So Joab sent someone to Tekoa and had a wise woman brought from there. He said to her, "Pretend you are in mourning. Dress in mourning clothes, and don't use any cosmetic lotions. Act like a woman who has spent many days grieving for the dead. Then go to the king and speak these words to him." And Joab put the words in her mouth.” 2 Samuel 14:2-3
At first it seems manipulative… and there was much risk… but the heart and intention was so pure, it ruled out. Ultimately, it was the right thing to do.
I can’t help but think about the church today. For years we have spoken our own language and expected outsiders to just “get it”, or else. Act a certain way, dress a certain way, even talk a certain way, “oh, brother, great to see you… oh yes, amen brother… doth things goeth well with you?”
Isn’t it funny how we are tempted to instantly pretend we're someone else the moment we hit the doors of a church building or get in the presence of someone who we know is more “Spiritual” than us? The R.E.M. song "Shiny Happy People" always comes to mind. We feel the pressure to act like we've got it all together, no problems or concerns. If it impacts and changes how we act, just imagine how odd and uncomfortable that feels to a non-believer seeking truth. No wonder the greatest accusation of a skeptic of faith is hypocrisy and/or a lack of authenticity.
We have to learn to speak the language of our hearers. And be brave enough to be ourselves. Jesus did that intuitively. It’s not a language of compromise. Therefore we have to discern the line of compromise. It’s not a language of law and behaving, it’s a language of love and belonging. It’s the heart of contextualizing the Gospel. Missionaries have been doing it overseas for years. It’s biblical and effective. We should do it here too.